Why all or nothing thinking doesn't help you achieve your health goals and how to frame things for better results.

emotional health
Josie Buck food and eating psychology coach.

Ever said, ‘I’m an all or nothing kinda person?’

If you think about it, this type of thinking refers to extremes.

You are either a success or a failure.

Your performance was totally good or totally bad.

The way this thinking can translate to your eating habits and fitness goals is....

I didn't eat particularly healthy food today, so I'll give up trying for the rest of the week..

I didn’t get out for a run so I can’t eat dinner.

I need to stick to this 30 day programme or it’s all bad.

Sound familiar?

This type of thinking gets in the way of attempts that you make to improve your health and well-being. If you think about things this way, it is likely that one indiscretion will derail all of your efforts, so it doesn’t support you in getting better at long term healthful behaviours.

Think about sitting an exam – are you ever 0% or 100%? No! You are any range of figures in-between and that’s ok! When we try and be the best at everything we set ourselves up to fail and we don’t get to enjoy doing it!

Exchange the Black and White for Shades of Grey

If you can start to change this type of thinking, you might find that being more relaxed in your thoughts gives you a FAR better chance of achieving your health goals. You are less likely to beat yourself up and and more likely to simply carry on.

If you're prone to ‘all or nothing thinking. Try these 3 things:

  1. Be aware of the language of your thoughts. If you hear yourself saying the words 'should' try replacing it with 'could'. I could go for a run today makes it feel so much better than telling yourself you 'should' do something.
  2. Count your successes! At the end of each day, take two minutes to mentally or physically note the things you did well that day. It might just be, I ate more veg, or I went for a walk. It is NEVER all bad.
  3. Say ‘and’ instead of ‘or’. Example: I had a great day or a terrible day, changes to; I had some good things happen today and some challenges. I’m in a good mood or a bad mood, to: I felt good some of the time and annoyed some of the time. Instead of “I had a great week or a terrible week,” consider, “I had some wonderful things happen this week and some things that were difficult.”

Softening your thought language can really expand your perspective and encourage personal growth. It also helps you HUGELY when you are trying to make lifestyle changes.

Here’s to a happy, healthy you!